Entering the playing field

A friend of mine, Nico, whose 50th birthday was celebrated last week in the theme "Lust for Life", wrote the following in response to reading this blog. It's an honour to be able to share his thoughts here:

"I find myself struggling with new feeling inside myself. I guess it is spring and new feeling want to grow, blossom and bloom. Or maybe it is because I have entered the age of the big five-o. When I discussed it with friends the thought rose that it could be my male side developing further. Being a 50 year old man this thought was both promising and disturbing. There was a good point in it, but not the point to win the game

Then I realized myself that it is probably a next step in the path that started a few years ago. I discovered that my possibilities in life are Love, Power and Joy. Since then I have been growing into the person I am now. Love, power and joy are now firm foundations in my personal life and in my personal relationships with my kids and my friends. The thing that seems to be growing is the next step of bringing these possibilities into the world on a larger scale. So out of my personal world into the open world.

I realize myself that this may be another term for developing the male side. Personal environment and especially the care for children is normally considered the female side. And using power to change the world on a larger scale is seen as being the male side.
As I am entering this new playing field I realize myself that I need a new tool set to be successful. In my personal life it is the ability to handle feelings (understand, interact, show) which is the key to success. Out in the open world this is not the case. It is the ability to handle action that is needed: come into action, bring people into action, inspire, steer, energize, make/keep the motor running.

There is both a promising and a disturbing side to this insight. The promising side is that I will find ways to bring love, power and joy to the world, and that this will make the world a better place to be in. The disturbing side is that I have to leave my warm and safe personal world and step out in the open. I do not have to lose this warm and safe place completely, but at least partly as you cannot do everything.

As Spiderman said: “With great powers come great responsibilities”.

And then I realized. Maybe it is not the male/female thing. Maybe it is just growing (up?). Entering a new playing field, with new rules, and new types of relationships with others who share the same goals: making the world turn into the right direction. Let’s play!"